You’re only as good as your breasts

Another day as floor manager in a strip club. Yesterday I was a happy camper with the unreliability of dancers in general to show up for their shifts. But today they all showed up and on time. So I was in a good mood. Lola, my brand new never before bartended before bartender was on schedule for today and I let her run the bar and I got out of her hair. You’ve got to give a person room to settle in. A couple of shifts under her belt and she is showing promising signs. Today I showed her a secret behind making martinis. It is a very simple process but you would be surprised how many bartenders (wannabes) don’t have a clue about what they are doing. What I like about Lola is that she is a total sweetheart and is very friendly with guests. What I like about her also is that while my other bartenders are thinking “what do I have to do”, Lola is thinking “what CAN I do?”. There is a very big difference and it is summed up in the word initiative. I gave her a lot of positive feedback today and pointed out some minor problems. The minor things that she has going wrong are nothing to be surprised at and will disappear with time. She will make a great bartender.

One of the aspects of my job is auditioning dancers. For the girls that are knockouts it is easy to do. But the hard ones are the girls who aren’t. As our club is getting more and more dancers, we are getting more and more picky in what we look for. Girls that were hired early on will be phased out when possible. It sucks but that is what we look for. I was talking to a girl today who was interested in the position but didn’t have time to audition. I was frank with her and told her that I’d have to see her body. I explained to her that in other jobs I was able to look past looks and see the skill that the girl possessed (or not). But this job was dependant in large respect to their looks. It is unnatural for me to look at their looks as a big factor in hiring them or not. The girl I was talking to completely understood what I was saying, being in the industry as long as she’s been.

I will work at the club and girls are always walking around naked and I’ve come to see past it. But when I go into the dressing room I am still sometimes off balanced. I have to keep my eyes shielded or look the other way when they put their tops on. Most of the girls think I’m cute or something because of this… but it is just a natural reaction.

One girl was pretty upset today. It was the end of her shift and she was being invited out for drinks with another dancer. But the girl was very upset because she wanted to go and have some fun but she said she had to go home and give at least $100 to her boyfriend or he’ll get mad. She was shaking and near tears. I put my arms around her and stood there for a long time until the shaking subsided. The girl told me that she can’t press charges (I was able to deduce that he has hit her before) because he will get angry with her or he’ll take her baby away. He is also the father of the baby. My heart went out for the girl and her condition. I tried to make the girld feel somewhat better, stressing self reliance, living her own life, and such. But she doesn’t have the resolve to do anything. She is totally the sort of person, right now, that would welcome him back if he put her in the hospital. She has very crooked teeth, a product of his anger. The girl needs to document histories and get herself another job and try to make a stand. Easy for me to say, I’m not the one to do it. Talking with another girl about the situation I stressed the fact that the girl was a stripper. In a perfect world a judge might see how hard she works and award custody to her. But it isn’t a perfect world and just beause she is a stripper the judge might think that she is an unfit mother. That is a hard choice to make… leave abuse and lose your kid or stay with the abuse and keep your kid. Poor girl.

I saw the guy for a brief moment when he came to pick her up. A dirty, shady looking guy. I didn’t know he was here to pick her up as I thought he was just another patron to walk in the door of the club. My first thought was ‘great, another dirty bastard who’s never heard of taking a bath or has a clue what personal hygiene is” and it turned out that he was her boyfriend.

Maybe I need to kick his ass, a royally good ass kicking. The kind where you’re eyes are swollen, you can’t move well, a broken rib or two, and maybe a fractured radial bone. Maybe if this asshole was sent into the emergency room for having his ass beat, all the while being yelled at for how pathetic he is and why can’t he get off his lazy ass and work (crap he yells at her), maybe he’d realize something. But maybe, after having his ass beaten with an axe handle he’d become meaner and nastier, and she’d run back to him and her life would be worse.

Was Billy Bob Thorton’s character in “Slingblade” so wrong?

It is 22:00 hours and I’m a bit pooped. I hate day shifts. I am going to lounge about for a while and then go to sleep and dream and such. Tomorrow is day off and I’d like to bake an apple cinnamon streussel (I think that is how you say it) or perhaps something else one of many cookbooks (I have 15 of them). Hopefully Kelsey will call and she can be my guinea pig for my baking.


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