Light the Fire

It was time for Faerieworlds again. I look forward to this every year. In 2015 I was at a peak. It had been a good year. I’d gone to see Shakespeare. Been to the Oregon Country Fair. Seen Yngwie Malmsteen in concert. Was dating around with some beautiful women (both inside and out). I was […]

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Going Down

It is the weekend and my day is filled with books, coffee, and incense. I put on some good music and sat in front of my altar for a while. On my altar sit a variety of things. It is less a geometric space akin to a physical mandala as some altars are, but more […]

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Niflheim

I went on a hike a few weeks ago. It was a bright, crisp day, and the colors of Spring were vibrant. I felt energized just by being outside in the forest. The trails, cutting through the trees, were clear and contrasted with the surrounding rushes and grasses. While I was free to go in […]

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Wolf Dream

It was a couple of nights ago, perhaps a week. But I had a dream early in the morning where I went into a deep forest. It was twilight, not fully night or day. I’m uncertain if it was dawn, or dusk, or perhaps actually midday and the depth of the wood made it dark, […]

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why

Tonight I fell, again, into depression. It has been happening a lot lately. This year has been rough. This afternoon I laid on my couch for I don’t know how long. Minutes? Hours? The tv was off. The lights were dim. And I stared into space. I am without energy. I have wondered, all night, […]

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Sowilo

Yesterday’s emotion was a surprise. It also came on at the same time that I fell sick with a cold, no doubt from entering into this motel room where I’ve been for two days. Last night I thought I would drown in my own fluids. Before I went to bed, however, I drew a single […]

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PTSD is NOT permanent

Look at the different criteria for a diagnosis of PTSD. Pick one that is without a doubt permanent without chance of healing? In criteria B, C, D, and E, perhaps “Recurrent, involuntary, and intrusive memories” is a candidate for permanence, yet I want to point out three thoughts with this. 1: intrusive memories and thoughts […]

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Walk in this world

While attending a week-long training at the library in Medford, Oregon and during a break I was standing in the window, observing the scene across the street. Across the street is a small Italian pizzeria and outside on the sidewalk were two people with a table set up and were offering some paraphernalia. I could […]

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Why I Run Marathons

… for a split second. Gripping the tree trunk I slowly stood up. I wouldn’t make my goal of 4 hours, but I wouldn’t quit. I would finish. Perhaps I could still set a new PR (which is 4:09). It wasn’t over yet, neither was I. Though it hurt, though I didn’t know where I was going to get the strength to keep going, I knew that my tank was not yet empty. There was more left and I intended to mine the depths of what I had.

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Macwriter

Mac kills PC in so many areas. I find that my workflow crashes to a halt when I have to go into the office and use their Windows systems. I hesitated in downloading any Microsoft programs onto my Mac because I don’t like anything about them, how they are organized. Even using Excel, which is […]

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