Between eight and ten years ago I regularly went to therapy. I was struggling with two major forces at the time. The first was that my sense of normal, the horizon of my moral landscape, was still that of someone on a deployment. This is to say that in this context there is a survive […]Read More … or should I get a cup of coffee?
Paganism: Pagan holidays, beliefs, gods and goddesses, symbols, rituals, practices, and much more! An Introductory Guide by Riley Star My rating: 2 of 5 stars This is an introduction for someone that has nowhere else to start. If you want a quick lay of the land. Right off the bat I appreciated the author’s eloquence. […]Read More Yet another intro to paganism book
It was time for Faerieworlds again. I look forward to this every year. In 2015 I was at a peak. It had been a good year. I’d gone to see Shakespeare. Been to the Oregon Country Fair. Seen Yngwie Malmsteen in concert. Was dating around with some beautiful women (both inside and out). I was […]Read More Light the Fire
It is the weekend and my day is filled with books, coffee, and incense. I put on some good music and sat in front of my altar for a while. On my altar sit a variety of things. It is less a geometric space akin to a physical mandala as some altars are, but more […]Read More Going Down
I quit running long marathons last year after having discovered Spartan Races. This, plus my love of CrossFit and I quit doing the many 10, 15, 20 mile runs I was always doing. In the nine months I’ve done very little pure exercise, spending most of my time in instructor duties. Easy to start making […]Read More Running and trying not to die (or trying to live)
I want to love. I want to have a love where I can share the totality of my being with another person and for them to see me, and I to see them. I want them to actively bring out the best within me, pushing me and angering me when necessary, but always loving me. I want to be the sort to do that in return.Read More Losing my self
“Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able? Then he is not omnipotent. Is he able, but not willing? Then he is malevolent. Is he both able and willing? Then whence cometh evil? Is he neither able nor willing? Then why call him God?” The problem with quotes by philosophers is that much of […]Read More Dare. Risk. Dream.
I have held a grudge against my biological mother for a long time. Wait, not a grudge… I’ve been indifferent to her. She didn’t hit me… no more than the typical spankings that most kids got in Arkansas in the 70’s and 80’s. I don’t have any harsh memories of her spankings. The last time […]Read More Forgiveness
I might not have been ready for my car five years ago. But doing the work, meditating regularly, viewing difficulties as opportunities to develop my best self, realizing that I am not the center of the universe and that others have their own interests also, has helped prepare me for this car. Now I *can* drive my car, enjoying the experience, being energized by it, instead of the other way around.Read More Traffic is my yoga (or Marcus Aurelius in a Mustang)
I had Friday off. I did my 06:00 CrossFit workout, went home and made coffee, and goofed off on the computer a bit. I checked on projects, emails, calendars, and then made my way to WordPress. I have 20% of what I’ve journaled in my life on the computer. Prior to discovering Livejournal I filled up […]Read More Open